Because dogs playing poker is too mainstream…
After a while of playing Poker Night At The inventory 2, I got bored and came up with this silly idea. Enjoy it.
A little practice at making posters with Source Film Maker changing the camera and light source values along with the SSAO to make it look better than my previous attempts. You tell me.
I should stop working on these things and focus more on the Tumblr… But given how much homework I have to do lately, this is the only means of fun I have to avoid blowing out my head.
Finally an update! Sorry for the delay.
We wanted to make original models instead of the current ones (mostly because 99% of them are Vocaloids), and then my friend’s computer broke, and we had to wait until it was repaired before we could continue with this.
Hope you can forgive us (And if you dont, then blame my friend, not me).
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9
#91: I can’t make questions about Cadence’s sexual orientation.
#91.5: Making a bet is not a excuse.
#92: Discord doesn’t need my help spreading chaos to Earth. We’re already pretty caotic without his intervention.
#93: I can’t start a new religion.
#93.5: I can’t use an already existing religion and make ponies join it for fun.
#94: I’m not Luna’s favorite student.
#94.2: Playing videogames with her doesn’t count as studying.
#94.3: Besides, she should be my student since I’m the one teaching her how to play.
#95: When anypony asks where I come from, I can’t reply “from a galaxy far, far away”.
#95.2: Or “Hello. My name is Iñigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die”.
#95.3: Or “I’m the Doctor”, and when they ask “Doctor who?” reply “No, just the Doctor”.
#95.4: Doctor Whooves doesn’t appreciate that I use his name for pranks.
#96: I can’t break the 4th wall. We don’t want another Crisis on Infinite Earths. (Rule edited because I already used this one before)
#97: Princess Luna is not Batmare.#97.2: That’s what they want me to believe, but I know the truth.
#97.3: Adrian is not allowed to edit these rules.
#98: Unicorns don’t feel attracted to virgins.
#98.2: Just because Twilight allows me to stay at her library, Rarity always wants to design clothes for me and I’m a virgin doesn’t have to mean anything aside of being good friends.
#98.3: Of course, that’s a complete lie. You’re just being paranoid.
#99: There’s not a secret society observing eveerything I do.#99.2: But I know the truth, and they want to make everypony to think I’m a crazy person.
#99.3: You didn’t really need help with that in the first place.
#100: I can’t write fake rules to win some time until the next update is finished.
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#81: Playing with Gummy doesn’t automatically turn me into the Crocodile Hunter
#82: Drawing a fake Cutie Mark with a marker on the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ flank is not funny.
#83: I can’t threaten anypony with Dark magic.
#83.2: Or White Magic.
#83.3: Or Red Magic
#83.4: I can’t threaten with any color of magic.
#84: I can’t make Wanted posters with the face of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon.
#84.2: Even if it was the Cutie Mark Crusaders idea.
#84.3: Even though they’re bullies and they deserved it.
#85: I can’t play the Jaws theme and throw Gummy wearing a fake shark flipper whenever somepony bathes in the spa.
#85.2: Or play the Psychosis theme when Rarity is taking a shower.
#85.3: But I can play “Don’t stop me now” when Rainbow Dash runs. She loves it.
#86: Nopony is conspiring against me. Yes they do. No, we don’t.
#87: I can’t make any space jokes from Portal 2 if Princess Luna is present.
#87.5: Mostly because she joins the fun and always uses her Royal Canterlot voice, destroying everything in sight.
#88: I can’t ask Fancypants why does he have such name if he isn’t wearing any pants.
#89: Body paint is not considered clothing.
#90: Beating Trauma Center doesn’t automatically turn me into a doctor.
#90.2: Especially since I used cheats to beat the game.
#90.3: I’m only allowed to take care of minor injuries and placing bandages if there’s a real doctor watching.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 9 - Part 10
#71: I cannot flirt with Princess Luna.
#71.2: She’s a 1000+ year old Princess (even though she preserves herself pretty well). It wouldn’t work.
#71.3: Besides, Celestia never falls for it. It stopped being funny after the first time.
#72: Doors are locked for a reason.
#72.2: Rarity doesn’t appreciate me kicking her bedroom door down at 3 A.M. to suggest a disco inferno.
#72.3: Even if Rainbow Dash does the kicking.
#73: I am not allowed to peek inside the spa when Rainbow Dash is showering.
#73.2: Even though she’s always nude.
#73.3: Even if she does have a lovely plot.
#73.4: I am certainly not allowed to take pictures and send them to everyone I know.
#73.5: But Rarity said I could look in at her anytime I like.
#74: I can’t say “Give her jewels. Bitches love jewels” when we talk about Rarity’s birthday gift.
#75: Bananas are not toys.
#75.5: Princess Celestia has been informed of this too.
#76: I am not allowed to say “But we do this in Earth all the time” whenever I break a rule.
#76.5: Quoting “Rules were made to be broken” doesn’t work.
#77: Dracula isn’t hiding inside the old castle of the Everfree Forest.
#77.2: And the villagers aren’t lying to me.
#77.3: Even though telling me things like “GET A SILK BAG FROM THE GRAVEYARD DUCK TO LIVE LONGER” makes no goddam sense.
#78: I can’t blame Discord for all the problems in Equestria.
#78.5: Even though he admitted that most of them are his own fault.
#79: I can’t tell horror stories because I always end up scaring everypony.
#79.5: Especially stories about how we sacrifice horses when they break their legs.
#80: I can’t keep a manticore as a pet.
#80.2: Or a changeling.
#80.3: ESPECIALLY a changeling.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10
#61: Gum does not belong on the underside of the library table.
#61.2: Or on the door.
#61.3: The floor.
#61.4: In the shelves.
#61.5:Gum is banned from the library.
#62: I’m not allowed to host a karaoke night in the library.
#62.5: Or anywhere else aside of the karaoke bar.
#63: I can’t send prank letters to Celestia.
#64: If the doorbell rings, I am not allowed to say “Bring out yer dead!”
#64.2: I can’t say “Ding dong, the Witch is dead!” neither.
#64.3: Especially if Rarity is present or within earsdrop territory.
#64.4: Anything aside of “Please, enter”, “the door is open” or “it’s your turn” is not allowed.
#65: I am not allowed to graffiti any interior or exterior surface of the library or any other building, for that matter.
#65.5: Sticking stuff on the walls of my side of the guests room is okay as long as I do not damage said walls.
#66: I am not allowed to leave my homework around the library.
#66.2: Twilight will finish it, and it makes my teachers suspicious.
#66:3: She will make fun of me when I have trouble understanding a “simple” concept. Like trigonometry.
#67: I can’t blame anypony else when I scream like a little girl.
#68: I can’t replace Twilight’s books with edited versions where all the answers are 42.
#69: I can’t give her a book about networking computers and then laugh at her face when she asks me “What’s a computer?”.
#70: I can’t laugh at everypony an call them dinosaurs just because in my world our technology is far advanced than Equestria.
And in other things, I finally managed to create my own OC for Source Filmmaker, called Brownie. For those of you who remember this from last year, just wanted to say that this one is made from scatch, while the other one was just a reskin of Dr Whooves.
Let’s take a break from this wall of text. This is my own version of a humanized Rainbow Dash. It’s just a sketch, but as soon as I can I’ll upload the color version.
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10
#51: Danger is not my middle name.
#51.5: Even if I legally change it, it won’t be considered official.
#52: I can’t mix Zecora’s potions to see what will happen.
#53: I can’t give new ideas to get a Cutie Mark to the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
#54: There isn’t a Cutie Mark for playing videogames.
#54.5: And even if it existed, it wouldn’t count as a profitable job.
#55: Belonging to another world doesn’t automatically make me an ambassador.
#55.2: Or a duke.
#55.3: Or a prince.
#55.4: Or a king.
#55.5: I can’t have any other title aside of “visitor with special rights”.
#56: Luna game is forbidden all over Equestria.
#56.5: That goes for Story of the Blanks too.
#57: Refering to #56.5, there isn’t a hidden village of blank flanks within the Everfree Forest.
#58: The staircase of the Crystal Empire tower is not a landslide.
#58.5: That means that I can’t sell tickets for everypony to take a ride.
#59: Heavy Metal is not the best kind of music to play at 3 A.M.
#59.2: Especially in Celestia’s room while she sleeps.
#59.3: Even if Luna gives me permission. Just because she rules at night doesn’t mean she’s allowed to change the laws at will.
#60: I must wear a swimsuit whenever I visit the spa.
#60.5: Only ponies and any other creatures from Equestria are allowed to be nude.
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#41: I can’t sing “That old grey mare is not my old grey mare” with Derpy.
#41.5: Especially if my pants are down.
#42: I can’t cut the apples from Applejack’s orchad as a training to play Ninja Fruit.
#42.5: That goes for all the fruit I can find in Equestria.
#43: I can’t use a Master Ball to capture Celestia.
#43.5: Although she feels honored that I consider her a Legendary type.
#44: Refering to #43, Pinkie Pie can’t tag along.
#45: The party canon is for parties. It can’t be used to play Paintball.
#45.5: Neither can I pour an entire bag of flour and make everypony think it’s snowing in the middle of summer.
#46: I can’t dress one of Rarity’s mannequins with a smokin and place it in front of the Everfree Forest to make everypony think it’s Slendermane.
#47: Just because I always wear a full set of clothes, that doesn’t make me the richest creature of Canterlot.
#48: I shouldn’t mention that I like oranges more than apples in front of Applejack.
#49: Even though ponies don’t wear pajamas in a pajama party, that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t wear mine.
#49.5: Especially if Lyra is attending the party.
#50: I can’t replace sugar cubes with salt cubes in Pinkie Pie’s chocolate. We don’t want another incident like last time.
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#31: I can’t place Poison Joke in Angel’s salad
#31.5: Even though that rabbit deserves it.
#32: I can’t mention how much I love meat in front of Fluttershy.
#33: I can’t say that Princess Celestia and Discord act like an old married couple.
#33.2: They’re only offended because I called them “old”.
#33.3: Even though they really are old.
#34: I can’t ride other ponies.
#34.2: Not because it’s considered offensive, but because they can barely support my weight.
#34.3: Only Princess Celestia, Luna and Cadence can support my weight, but they’re too busy with royal business to take part in such childish games.
#34.4: Even though Luna really loves to play, working is her first priority, no matter how much she wants to take a break.
#35: No matter how well can I make a fake document, I’m not a doctor.
#35.2: Or a veterinary.
#35.3: And I can’t go around giving hugs because it’s been scientifically proved to cure loneliness.
#35.4: Any report written by me can’t be considered scientific nor official by any institution.
#35.5 Especially if it’s been confirmed by any institution founded by me.
#36: I can’t jump over Ponyville’s roofs wearing a sweater hoodie trying to emulate Altaïr Ibn-La’Ahad.
#36.2: Or Ezio Auditore da Firenze.
#36.3: Or Connor Kenway.
#36.4: Just don’t jump over the roofs.
#37: I can’t keep a Timberwolf as my pet and call him “Woody”.
#38: Earth ponies are not Muggles.
#38.5: Whatever that word means, it can’t be a good thing.
#39: I can’t go with Rarity in search of gems and later sell them in Earth.
#40: I can’t carry around a typewriter to save my game.
#40.2: Or banana coins.
#40.3: Or play the magic flute to call a Moguri.
#40.4: We’re still studying how the heck did a Moguri appear from nowhere.





